


A Light without Shadow darkens

by reflectedmisery



Category: Red vs. Blue
Genre: Depression, Human AI AU, Kinda fucking creepy, M/M, Modern AU, Self Harm, This is a little creepy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-07-09
Updated: 2013-07-08
Packaged: 2017-12-18 04:39:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,959
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/875732
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/reflectedmisery/pseuds/reflectedmisery
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A Doc/Omega modern day fic.<br/>~~~<br/>It was raining. The man held out a hand into the rain and watched as the liquid pooled up and slid off, soaking the bandages he had on his palm and arm. It was late December and it was a little cold to be raining.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is a little disturbing. Sorry.

It was raining. The man held out a hand into the rain and watched as the liquid pooled up and slid off, soaking the bandages he had on his palm and arm. It was late December and it was a little cold to be raining. He wondered how many people were going to get hypothermia as a result. Doubtless the hospital would be crowded for the next month or so. Like it had been for the last month or so. 

He pulled out his umbrella and opened it, stepping out into the rain. He started walking along the wet sidewalk to his apartment, which was about seven blocks away. He shivered and pulled his black trench coat tighter around himself. As he walked, he began to feel rather melancholic. Memories surfaced. The day he first met him. When his other held a knife to his throat. When he witnessed what everyone thought was the death of his other. 

~

O’Malley always did flit from person to person. He would stay near one person for a while, then find another. First it was Tex. He wasn’t around for that. Then it was Caboose. That was kind of creepy. Then O’Malley decided to follow him. One minute he was walking to his apartment and before he knew what was going on, he was pushed against a wall, staring into the insane violet eyes of the man. He had shaggy hair that looked like obsidian and a psychotic smile that made him look like he should be in a mental ward. He knew who it was immediately. The guys had described O’Malley to him. O’Malley then explained to him that they would be roommates for a while. He nodded numbly to his new roommate. 

~

Back in the present, the man had reached his apartment building. He went through the front door and climbed the stairs to his apartment on the third floor. He closed the door behind him and locked it, something he hadn’t started doing until they met. He placed the coat on the rack and walked to the kitchen. He turned on the coffee maker and put some grounds in. Black, like his other used to like it. 

~

So O’Malley stayed with him for a while. They were polar opposites, they soon affirmed. He was a pacifist and O’Malley was chaotic and violent. It was interesting living with him. O’Malley kept disappearing at odd times and reappearing covered in blood, cuts, and bruises. He would always fix him up, because he wanted too, not because O’Malley made him. If O’Malley had his way, he would probably fix the cuts himself. Which he did once. It was a disaster. He almost killed himself, and the man found his roommate lying in a pool of his own blood, unconscious. He tried to quickly fix his roommate’s haphazard stitching before he lost too much blood, but O’Malley ended up having to stay in bed for a week anyway. At least he woke up so he didn’t have to take him to the hospital. He had a feeling O’Malley’s wounds would be hard to explain. 

~

The coffee was done. He ran a hand through his nut-brown hair and went to get a mug. At first he reached for his favorite purple one, but he found himself grabbing the one his other always used. He wasn’t here to use it anyways. 

~

O’Malley respected his space, for the most part. But then one day in November last year the man had come home upset. There was a pretty girl that he had liked so he asked her out and she laughed in his face. When he got home, his face was blotchy and his eyes were red from crying. O’Malley wasn’t in the best mood either and it seemed worse when the man got home and tried to talk to his roommate about it. He told O’Malley why he was upset and O’Malley just seemed to get angry. He tried to ask O’Malley what was wrong with him, and O’Malley walked over to him and frowned. He held his face a little to close to the man’s so he just stared at his roommate, puzzled, and started to back away. Suddenly O’Malley lunged for him and roughly pressed their mouths together. After he got over the shock of what his roommate was doing, he started to struggle. O’Malley tangled his hands in the man’s hair and pulled him deeper into the kiss. Panicking, he shoved him away. He shoved him. O’Malley stared at him. He was a pacifist. He never insulted anyone, let alone shoved. O’Malley looked at him blankly for a moment then walked out of the apartment. 

A few days later, when O’Malley came back, the man had had time to think. About what his roommate meant to him, among other things. O’Malley was pretending that nothing had happened. He stared at his roommate. Then he walked over to O’Malley. They looked into each other’s eyes for a minute. And he kissed O’Malley. 

~

He had put back his other’s mug in place of another one. This one was a gift he gave to his other. Neither ever really used it. He slowly sipped the black coffee. Suddenly the mug went flying against the wall. It shattered as tears streamed down his face. He needed to go for a walk so he could calm down. So he could preserve his sanity. He grabbed his coat off the rack and walked out the door. 

~

When he finally broke off, there was an odd twitch to O'Malley's lips. Then he smiled softly. A real smile. Not his usual psycho smile, but a genuine smile. 

The next few months were happy ones. Being around O’Malley kind of separated him from Church and the guys, but O’Malley appreciated him more than they ever did anyway. O’Malley gave him nicknames like Ember and little flame. Their favorite for him was Light and O’Malley’s was Shadow. Then O’Malley became somewhat distant. He would stay up late planning…something. He would fall asleep at the desk and the man would have to carry his boyfriend to bed. One day he was called by Church to help Tucker with something. Apparently he was sick and his stomach hurt. When he got back to the house, O’Malley was gone. He waited weeks in vain for him to come back. But O’Malley never did.

~

He was in the park. It was actually snowing now, not just raining. It was late now, so there was no one else there. He walked a little ways deeper into the middle of the park, until the pain grew too much. He fell to his knees and started sobbing. After a few minutes he noticed the shadow of a person behind him. 

~

The man was walking home from work one day when he heard the screech of tires and a crash. He ran as fast as he could towards the sound, his white lab coat billowing behind him. When he got there Church and the others were all standing around. He asked Church what was going on, but Church was just staring at the wreckage, a desolate look on his face. He asked Donut. Donut told him that Tex, Crunchbite, and Tucker’s kid were in the accident. As an afterthought he added that O’Malley was in there as well. He stared at Donut in horror, then at the car. It was in flames. No one could have been able to survive that. 

~ 

The shadow got closer. The man picked up his head and snarled at the shadow behind him. 

“Light?” The person stepped forward again. “Doc?”

~ 

The months following the crash, he let himself go. They all told him O’Malley was dead. He tried to deny it, but he just sank into depression. He let his hair grow longer. He wore O’Malley’s favorite color, black, more often than his own. It was all he could do to get up and go to work in the morning. That brought him to where he was now, almost ten months later. He had been telling the guys not to say happy holidays again, but this time it was because he was actually depressed, not because just some person they come across could be. David had screamed at him to get over it and he was left on the outside of their circle again. 

Alone this time. 

~

Doc stood up and turned around, clenching his fists. The man in front of him was wearing a dark purple hoodie, the hood over his head. “What do you want, O’Malley?!” he snarled. 

O’Malley pulled back the hood. “I wanted to talk to you. I would like to have our former arrangement back.”

“‘Former arrangement!?!?’” he spat. His face was contorted in rage. “Is that all our relationship was to you?!?! An arrangement?!?!”

“Doc-” He began to say something but he trailed off. 

“That’s what I thought.” He turned to leave. 

“Light! Wait!” Doc stopped, but didn’t turn around. “I didn’t mean it like that.” 

“Then what did you mean it as?” he said bitterly.

“I didn’t want to leave. But I had more important things that I had to do at the time.” he reached out and touched Doc on the shoulder. 

Doc’s face distorted in anger. He clenched his fists so hard he made his palms bleed from the nails digging into his skin. Then all of a sudden, he swung around and smashed his fist into O’Malley’s face. 

O’Malley recoiled shrieking and holding his now bleeding nose. “‘More important things?’ Then I guess you don’t need me. Do you, Omega.” he said coldly. 

O’Malley took his hand off his face and gave Doc a hurt look. He winced at the blood coming from O’Malley’s nose. He would feel bad about that later. 

“How could you- How did you- Y-you hit me!!!” he stammered. 

“YOU LEFT ME!!!!” Doc screamed, furious. “And then I thought you were DEAD!!! Now you are standing here wondering why I’m so upset.” He calmed himself and made his expression neutral, hiding the insanity that was creeping into his mind. Then he moved in front of O’Malley and grabbed his chin to examine his nose. “It’s not broken,” he murmured. “Just bruised and bleeding. It should clear up in a couple days. I apologize for my outburst.” He turned and started walking away again.

He heard O’Malley snarl and moments later he was slammed against a tree. O’Malley had a knife to his throat. “You belong to me, you hear!? I was being nice to ask earlier. You. Belong. To ME!!!”

Surprisingly, he laughed. He could feel his sanity slipping away and his eyes clouded up. This was too much for him to handle. In his confusion, O’Malley loosened his grip. “You can’t hurt me any more. Not as much as you already did. What I’ve already done to myself.” He shoved O’Malley away and pulled up his sleeves to reveal twin bandages on his wrists. There were oddly shaped bloodstains showing through them. ”You see, I’m already broken beyond repair.” He laughed again. It sounded a little insane.

O’Malley pinned him against the tree again and unwrapped the bandages. There were fresh scars on the inside. They were symbols.

Omegas.

Doc giggled insanely again. “Pretty, aren’t they? I-I missed you.” He shivered and started giggling again. “Th-thought I would see you again.” He frowned. “But I was a coward. Couldn’t do it.”

“Why, Light?” O’Malley managed to say. “Why?”

Doc’s eyes cleared. His mind felt sane again and it showed on his face. “I missed you, my shadow. I love you.” He felt exhausted. He slumped aganst O’Malley.

Doc felt O’Malley slowly putting his arms around him. He started sobbing uncontrollably. O’Malley just hugged him tighter. Then he whispered into his ear. “I will make sure no one hurts you again, okay?”

Doc looked up at the older man. “Even us?” He whispered back.

O’Malley’s violet eyes flashed. “Especially us.” He put his arm around Doc and started guiding him away. “It’s cold out here. Let’s go home.”

Doc clung to his other’s hoodie. “Yes, let’s.” he murmered in responce to his love.

And all around snow was falling.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is actually a continuation fic. Both can actually be concidered fics on their own. I am weird in my writing.

O’Malley cursed under his breath. He was late. Doc would probably already be home. He ran up the stairs to their apartment. He unlocked the door to find Doc sitting on the floor with his head between his knees, sobbing. O’Malley quick closed and locked the door and ran over to his unstable pet. “Light?” he said, pulling Doc close to him. “Are you okay?”  
Doc nodded. “I-I just th-thought you l-left m-me again. I-I didn’t kn-know if y-you’d be b-back.”  
O’Malley cursed himself yet again. This had been his fault, in more ways than one. “I’m not planning on leaving. How many times do I have to tell you that? Just because I’m not home when you come home from work, doesn’t mean I left you again. I have things I need to do as well, okay?”  
Doc nodded again. This wasn’t the first time this had happened. When he found Doc again, he was in a horrible state. Doc was severely depressed and had gone insane. He had even showed O’Malley the scars he had made on his wrists. It scared O’Malley. He was lucky that Doc had started going back to work.  
“Come on, Light.” He stood up and helped Doc to his feet. Then he started guiding his boyfriend to the bedroom so he could rest.  
~~~  
A few months later, Doc had finally come to term with O’Malley leaving him at the house by himself. This was good, because O’Malley could not and would not bring Doc with him when he was around his ‘brothers’.  
He left Doc watching TV with that look in his eye that meant he wasn’t really watching. He pulled up the hood on his black leather jacket and started heading to one of the shadier places in town.   
There was a bouncer at the door, to keep unwanted persons out. The man had a Mario mustache and went by Wyoming. Before O’Malley went in, he had to suffer through one of the bouncer’s irritating jokes.  
“Knock-knock, mate.”  
“Fuck off and let me in.”  
“Knock-knock.”  
O’Malley just gave him a glare that would send most people running.  
Wyoming grinned. “Knock-knock.”  
O’Malley rolled his eyes. “Who the fuck is there, asshole?”  
“Boo.”  
“Boo fucking who.”  
“Don’t cry.”  
Wyoming stepped aside and let O’Malley in. As he was walking past, he punched Wyoming in the gut. He heard a satisfying ‘oomph’ as he shut the door behind him.  
The place was dimly lit. It was kind of like a bar, with booths on the outside for people to talk with each other, and rooms in the back, if more sensitive matters were being discussed. O’Malley saw a flash of familiar bright red hair from one of the booths and he went walked over to join the people at that particular table. The redhead was Sigma and there was also Gamma. Sigma was a pale redhead with green eyes that always wore earrings and other jewelry, as he was gay. Gamma was tan with odd white hair and pale blue eyes. Sigma gave him a twisted grin as he sat down. “Hello, Brother Omega.”  
He nodded to him. “Hey, Sig, Gamma. What’s up? Anything knew?”   
Gamma spoke up. “Nothing really. We don’t have anything to do after that last job.” he said in that emotionless tone of his. It was why he was such a good liar. No one ever knew if he was lying unless they knew beforehand.   
Sigma grinned again and leaned back in his seat. “So let’s relax today.”  
O’Malley fidgeted in his seat and scowled. “If we’re not doing anything, then can I leave?”  
Sigma frowned at him. “Now what is wrong with you, Omega? You’ve been like this for the last few months. Which is odd, because before then, you were practically spending the night.”  
O’Malley rolled his eyes. “It’s none of your business.”  
“It is our business if it’s distracting you from us.” Gamma said.  
“Since when are you guys so worried about me anyways?”  
“Since we started working together. We are brothers now.” Sigma said, glaring.  
“Well maybe I have other things to worry about, besides you.” He got up from the table and left.  
Sigma watched him leave, an irritated look on his face.   
~~~  
He was back at the apartment. Doc was sleeping on the couch, and there were beer bottles around him. O’Malley didn’t keep that in the apartment. He shook Doc awake. Doc gave him a slurred look.  
“Wha, Malley?”  
“You are drunk, Light. Where did you get the alcohol?”  
“Bought it.”  
At least he wasn’t passed out in a bar somewhere. “You actually left the house and bought it?”   
“Yea.” He looked at O’Malley in confusion. “You’re not mad at me?” he said slowly.  
He shook his head and kissed Doc on the forehead. “I’m glad. You left the house for something other than work.”  
Doc smiled weakly. He closed his eyes and fell back to sleep.  
O’Malley sat on the floor next to the couch holding Doc’s hand for a long time. He fell asleep next to the couch.  
~~~  
He was hunting with his brothers. It was a week since he first found out that Doc was leaving the house by himself. He wouldn’t admit it, but he was feeling proud of his little pet. The thoughts occupied him as Sigma gave him the signal to move.   
The target was male, forty-two and in surprisingly good shape and dangerous for his age, which was why they were given the job. They were the best. The target was walking down the dark alleyway that was the shortcut that he used to get to his apartment. O’Malley was waiting for him on the roof of one of the buildings that made up the alleyway. He snickered quietly for a moment at the man’s stupidity. This was the perfect place for an ambush. He waited for the man walk almost right underneath where he was waiting. Then he jumped.  
He landed like a cat, except the target was cushioning his fall. The man was severely winded and was gasping for breath. He probably had several ribs broken. O’Malley pulled out his weapon of choice, a knife. The man gasped again and tried to move away, but only succeeded in hurting himself and he cried out in pain. Sigma came behind him and watched as O’Malley carved symbols all into the man’s skin.   
Three different ones.   
Gamma Sigma and Omega.   
Their names.   
The man died as O’Malley gleefully covered the man in the elaborate designs. Sigma put a hand on his shoulder and O’Malley drew back, handing his brother the knife. He took his own turn watching as Sigma turned the man on his back and carved the last mark. He called it the Meta symbol. It represented all of them. Not just Sigma, Gamma, and Omega, but their other brothers as well. Together. The mark had a strange beauty to it, being a combination of several Greek symbols.  
It sent shivers through O’Malley when his brother described them all together again. They would be unstoppable.   
But that was before Doc. O’Malley still longed for what Sigma spoke of, but he cared more for Doc. He hadn’t thought it was possible. He hadn’t told Sigma yet. He didn’t think he needed to.   
“Omega, Brother.” Sigma’s voice snapped his mind back to the present.  
“Yes, Brother?”   
“Let’s go.” Sigma smiled at him. A nice, friendly smile. As if they both hadn’t just killed someone.   
He nodded to Sigma. They started walking back when Sigma was distracted by something in a store. Jewelry. Sigma was so gay. “You go on ahead. I want to check this out.”   
O’Malley snorted, but walked on. After a while he got to the place where they always were. (Wyoming wasn’t there that day, thank god) He sat down at the bar where Gamma was waiting and the two just waited for Sigma.   
An hour later, Sigma was still not back. Gamma pulled out his phone. After a minute, Gamma hung up.   
“What did he say?”   
“He found another…toy.” Which meant Sigma found another boy to molest. It was one of his more irritating habits. O’Malley allowed it, though. As long as he could stay away. “He’s almost here.”  
Well, he guessed he could wait for Sigma, talk to him for a minute, then leave.   
A few minutes later, Sigma walked in dragging a young man wearing a hooded trench coat. He looked strangely familiar. O’Malley just couldn’t put a finger on it. He was obviously drugged. And it looked like he didn’t want to be with Sigma. He was struggling weakly, but he didn’t seem to want to hit Sigma. Just like the bastard to choose someone who wouldn’t fight back. The man ended up falling to the ground. He just stayed there, pulling his knees up to his chest and curling into a ball of sorts. O’Malley saw that the hands were bandaged. Sigma tried to pull him up and O’Malley caught a glimpse of frightened blue eyes behind glasses and nut brown hair underneath the hood.  
Doc.  
He let out a scream and punched Sigma away from his Light. He pulled Doc into his arms protectively and glared at anyone close. He felt Doc clinging to him as hard as he could, in his state.   
Sigma gave him a death glare. “And what gives you the right to do that, Brother?”  
“He belongs to me. He is my property.” he growled in reply.  
“Prove it.” Everyone was staring at them.  
O’Malley slowly took hold of one of Doc’s hands He began to unwind the bandages around them, but Doc pulled his hand away, whimpering slightly. O’Malley whispered into his ear. “It’ll be alright. They just need to see the scars. Then they’ll let us go home. We’ll go home, okay?” Doc slowly and hesitantly gave back his hand. O’Malley slowly and gently unwound the bandages.  
Doc shouldn’t have still needed to wear them, the original injury was months before, but he kept on reopening the scars so that they wouldn’t heal. So when O’Malley took the white cloth off of Doc’s wrists, the wound was an angry red. It clearly showed off the Omega.  
Sigma hissed. “You marked his wrists?! Even you wouldn’t do that! That’s sick!”  
O’Malley paid him little attention, carefully winding the bandage back around Doc’s wrist. “I didn’t. He did.” He murmured loud enough for Sigma to hear.  
Doc moved closer to O’Malley, burying his face in the other’s neck. O’Malley stroked his back softly. Sigma looked on, incredulous, as did everyone else. O’Malley was the most heartless, cruel person that they had ever met. This display of affection was so kind, that they couldn’t even speak out of shock.  
Still glaring at all of them, O’Malley picked up Doc bridal style and just left, leaving everyone in the bar staring after him. Then odd thing number two happened.  
Gamma started laughing.  
~~~  
The obsidian haired man gently set Doc down on the bed. He was sleeping, probably the result of whatever drugs that Sigma put into his system. O’Malley leaned down to kiss his Light’s forehead. When he went to go so Doc could have his sleep, his eyes were open, and he was holding onto O’Malley’s hand a little harder than should have been possible for someone in his state.  
“Don’t leave me.” He said weakly.  
O’Malley smiled at him softly. “Never.” He laid down next to Doc and watched him fall asleep, then fell asleep himself.


End file.
